Ixnay ARSay

It's official. No SAR for me until (possibly) the ship gets to San Diego. That wasn't necessarily the case going into work today. Yesterday, I got word from my first class who is up in Maine. Today, another first class, who initially put the word in and got SAR cleared for me, found out and said that my Chief (also in Maine) already cleared it. Good to go! Parm's back in the game, right? Not exactly. My instincts were right on why my LPO was reluctant for me to try collateral duty. We are undermanned with the number of people in my rate, therefore 5 sailors have to do the work of 6. I understood that and accepted it. No problem, I won't do SAR. Then I was hearing that the ship really needs SAR swimmers and that it does not affect normal operations while at sea. Only time it does is when someone jumps ship (ours or another ship) and at that point everyone works to get the straggler. So, does that mean I'm still on? I'm getting a bit confused here. Wait for it...Wait for it...no. They decided not to let me do SAR this time around for the above reason plus: PRT scores aren't fabulous (good, well Good High, not Excellent or Outstanding), the only current certified SAR swimmer is leaving for Maine on 1 AUG and wouldn't be there to help me train, and, finally, they don't want to risk an order modification for me to stay here for SAR school with the possibility of me failing out. Ok, sure. The school is tough, but, like most things, it's all mental. If I went, I could do it. Maybe have a month of intense training to prepare, but I could do it.

Before coming into the navy, I was a bit pessimistic. I would come up with reasons or excuses why things are unpleasant often times making the situation worse. Since going enlisted, my mind reversed itself. I've been coming up positive reasons why things are done a certain way or decisions that are made. This time will be no different. I have come to realize that it's....ok. I will still be working out, but I won't have to worry about killing myself. Besides, I'll get out of here in a month, see the ship, and start to get to know her. I might even start doing some work. (Did I just say that?) It may sound crazy, but I'm really looking forward to Maine. Perhaps it's because I will be one step closer to being at sea and that's what sailors do.